Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Epiphany

In my continuing quest to be more like Jesus, I have discovered a dilemma. You see, I hate surprise parties. Not just an "I don't prefer them," but a true hatred. All the anxiety about secretive planning, last minute SNAFUs, etc. Maybe it's because I'm a control freak. (Ya think?)

The dilemma is, I think God loves a surprise party. He loves to wait till the last minute when you think He's not going to come through. He is not inclined to tell you why, or even why He won't tell you why. This is a problem for me. I think I must have been the most annoying 4 yr. old ever, because I'm always trying to figure out why.

I know, I know. It's about faith, releasing control, trusting God. I know that control comes from fear. I know that He's never let me down before and He's not likely to start now. But, darn it (foot stomping here), I don't like surprises! I suppose I've had enough nasty surprises from the world that I am a little shell-shocked.

So, once again, I need to speak the truth. Jeremiah 29:11-14 (truly my "holding on for dear" life verse) "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the Lord, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."

Glory Hallelujah! It's a promise and I'm holding to it. But please, don't plan a surprise party for my birthday next week!

3 comments:

Barb said...

I'm a control freak too and I hate surprises. But you're right. It IS about faith, releasing control and trusting. Hope it doesn't surprise you if I wish you an early happy birthday. :-)

Diane said...

I left a comment earlier, but apparently blogger ate it. Bummer. :-)

Meet a fellow OCD/control freak. I don't like surprises either. So naturally I have issues with walking by faith, not by sight, and with waiting....and waiting....you get the picture.

Expecting to hear great things from you, and still praying, friend. :-)

Jennifer said...

Great illustrations here. I'm a control freak, too, but I usually can let up when I know someone is in control, and thankfully I usually realize that Someone is in great control.